*(I just don't feel like doing the linky thing tonight but the job referenced is mentioned in the post before this one. And Brandi, I am working on that tag, promise :) Can I have a few more hours?)
Actually it was not mine to begin with but I was praying and thought that it would be so wonderful for me. I would love all the people I worked with and the work that I would do. And the best part were the hours that would allow me to be at home at critical times of the day so that I didn't feel like I was slacking on my family.
When I got the call tonight that I wasn't the one, I have to admit it upset me. I was really disappointed even though I have been praying for God's will. I know that the ones who were doing the hiring were praying as well and that all things happen for a reason. I think this was just the straw that broke the camel's back for me tonight. We really need for me to go to work but I just don't want to have a job that requires me to be out of the house more of the day than I'm at home. Especially with "The Girls" added to the mix right now. Some friends of mine have suggested that maybe the reason I've had so many interviews and just as many rejections is that perhaps God wants me at home right now. The thing is, God knows our financial situation and how tough things have been and how stressed my husband can get, and I can't help but wonder why if that's what He wants He hasn't given Rick that memo. Our friends don't know this though. We've been pretty quiet about how our financial situation has looked, but it's not pretty. I don't want to go to work to have extra money to blow. I need to go to work so that we can climb out of this pit. I hate it, but it is the sad reality.
I know this is the pity-partiest post I have ever put out here but I have been down in the dumps all night. Waffling back and forth about posting this or not and I just had to get it off my chest. I'm praying and crying out for answers but just getting it out here helps a little too. Anybody know of a great part-time job for a mom who's passionate about orphans and adoption?