A Beautiful Way to End a Bad Week

Today is Sunday. The start of a new week. And thank God for it because this past week has been enough for me.

Meriah, over at With a Little Moxie, is hosting a blog hop focusing on finding the beauty. So, I dug up some old photos of Liza from the first day of school, cause they never fail to bring a smile to my face.

I hope they make you smile too. Take a load off. Decompress. Let's hope this coming week is a beautiful one. And, go to Meriah's blog and check out the other pics :)

Love her face in this one! LOL

She was really excited about all the cars going by that morning.

I think this one is my favorite. She's rubbing her hands
together cause she's SO excited. How can you not smile?

Almost Summer = More Time for Coffee

I am so glad Summer is almost here. I just can't even express how glad I am. Honestly. Today Liza's teacher called to reschedule the IEP (again) and I told her I'd spoken to the Principal already that morning. But, I called him by HER last name. That was awkward. So, yeah, see where I'm coming from?

Lately, I've been getting up in the morning and not making my coffee first. Because I've been getting up late and if I make coffee, Liza will likely miss the bus. So, I thought things were going ok, despite not having my coffee before starting the "get everybody ready and out the door" routine, but I'm thinking I was wrong. Wanna know how I can tell?

1. Yesterday I was brushing my teeth and looked over to see my toothbrush still in the toothbrush holder. True story. May have gagged a bit.
2. Today I put Liza on the bus without her shoes on. Which reminds me, I really should get a nice end-of-year gift for her "Bus-Man" and "Bus-Teacher".
3. Liza's class had a Happy Meal party and I forgot to send the money and the permission slip. The teacher had to call me to get permission. 

And, those are just a few recent examples of my lack of coffee brain farts.

So glad Summer's almost here. No more waking up early. No more trying to function without coffee. And, no more brain farts... Maybe? Well, we'll see....

Elizaveta Collette - 2+ years home

This is what I call her "orphanage Nanny" face.
She makes this face when I'm fussing at her... lol

Look at this gorgeous child! I (mostly) love it when she makes the above face at me, it cracks me up. Which makes it hard to be serious when I have to get on to her for something. She likes to think she is the one in charge and she doesn't take it kindly when I try and let her know that, in fact, I am the one in charge. You can't help but love this kid!

Look at all those first day K emotions! This makes me smile.

Elizaveta Collette is in Kindergarten now and really loves going to school. She likes circle time and anything to do with letters - because she knows them all (she's a smarty!). She has a favorite friend whose name is Trace and every time they are in the same room she has to be right next to him. Her teacher says he seems to enjoy her too. All I hear at home is "Kwace, Kwace". I think I like "Kwace", for now. We'll re-evaluate in a few years. Funny story: Trace has a twin named Chase who's in another class. One day Liza met Chase and her Aide said she just kept giving him the evil eye cause she knew it wasn't Trace, but just wasn't sure why he looked like Trace. Wish I could've been there.

Preschool!

Last year Liza went to Preschool at a local private preschool. The county wanted her to go to Kindergarten but I thought she needed an extra year of preschool, and it was SO good for her. I'm glad I stuck to my guns and allowed her that extra time.She loved her teachers and the encouragement of her friends at school was really beneficial to her and good for me as her mom. They would all be so excited for her when she would use a new word or when she chose to be a "nice friend" rather than ummm, a not so nice friend. Ahem....

She loved this bird we met at the pet store. I'm pretty sure he liked her too.

Summer 2012

Liza has come so far from the little girl she was in the orphanage, but yet she's still the same little girl that I met over two years ago. Sassy, sweet, bossy, and a whole lot of fun to hang out with. Every day I feel so blessed that I get to be her Mama, and yet, I still sometimes feel so sad for the ones who weren't able to parent her and experience the amazing gift that she is. I hope they know, somehow, that she's loved and beautiful. That she makes people smile and laugh everyday. She's the best girl ever!

Dealing With Bullies Part 1 or Assault = 1/2 Day ISS?!

Last week one of my boys came home and said he needed to tell me something and made me promise not to get mad at him. Dontcha just hate it when they do that? Well, I knew I needed to know what it was so I said I would try not to get upset depending on what it was. Here's what he told me:

That he got three people in trouble in his second block class. That they all got referrals and might be suspended or given ISS. 

I asked him how did he figure that it was his fault that these students got in trouble. HE told me this story:

A girl in his class said she wanted to put make-up on him and he told her no. She proceeded to try to apply the make-up anyway and he got up to walk away from her. She came after him with the make-up still trying to put it on him and he put his hands up in front of his face. A boy who is quite a bit bigger than him grabbed his hands and held him while this girl and another girl put the make-up on him. (Their goal didn't seem to be to be to make him "pretty" just to get the make-up on his face even though he had repeatedly said he did not want this to happen.)

Did you notice that he indicated these kids being in trouble was "his fault"? Yeah, that's because the girl who started all this told everyone that he said, it was"OK". And whether  A.) they believe her for some reason or B.) she's one of the "cool kids" or C.) they don't want her to decide she has a problem with them, my son is now the one who is looked on as the "problem" in all this. That is a problem to me! I am really angry that this happened in the first place, even more angry that it took place in the classroom and especially angry that the problem is being perpetuated by this child's obvious lack of remorse and placing the blame on my son!

The school's response? This I hope makes EVERYONE angry. I don't think I have to tell anyone that this is a case of assault. I have been told that it is definitely assault by the Principal, the School Resource Officer (AKA - Sergeant for the Sheriff's office who patrols the school), and everyone who I've told this story to. So, the school's official word on how they handled it is, "It was taken care of" and they can't tell me what that really means because it's confidential. In other words I am not allowed to know what disciplinary actions were taken against the other students because they are minors. I have since begun to believe that is a load of horsecrap created to protect the school system.

What I do know is that these same three kids were back in the classroom, second block (so about 10:30), with my son the very next day. This tells me that three children ,the Principals and the resident Police officer of the school agree, assaulted my child received 1/2 day of either In-School Suspension or Out-of School Suspension.

Does this seem right to ANYONE?! Because it certainly does not seem right to me. I am on a mission to get some  things changed and to get justice for my son. Right now he still sees himself as less than worthy of being treated with respect. The first red flag was when he told me that "he got some people in trouble". No! They got themselves in trouble! I refuse to bow down and just accept that the discipline that was given is enough. It's obvious to me that it's not enough by the fact that this girl is able to place the blame for her actions on my son and he is accepting it and just hoping this will all go away. Kids are still going around saying "Well, _____ said it was OK!", basically excusing the behaviour of the kids involved.

So, what are we doing about it?

• The first thing that I did was to call the Principal, the Assistant Principal was the one who actually "took care of it", but when I couldn't get her I spoke to the Head Principal. She basically said she would look into it, pretty much blamed it on the Substitute, and refused to tell me the discipline that was given. Oh, and strongly suggested that maybe my son would want to stay home the next day because he "was probably embarrassed". Um yeah, I think we all know now why she thought it might be a good idea for him not to be there the next day. She knew he would tell us that those kids were in class.
• The day after the incident Rick and I both went in and requested to speak to her, the assistant who handled it, and the resource officer (who happened to not be in). Nothing really was changed, we were told once again that they were looking into it, they couldn't tell us what discipline was given, and that yes, the same sub was back again that day but they expected the regular teacher back the next day. Head Principal also tried to excuse the other children's behavior by saying that _______ had allowed them to put his hair in ponytails in the past and that he also had allowed makeup (he denies the past makeup and says the girls play with all the boys' hair, and different girls - not the one involved here). Rick made sure to make the point that no matter what was allowed in the past that when he told them no this time he should have been left alone. They could not deny this. They both also admitted that, yes, it was a case of assault and we can press charges and we can also sue the school if we don't feel they handled it correctly. (As of May 3 I have not heard back regarding their "investigation")
• I also called the Sheriff's office and talked to the Resource Officer who also confirmed that it is assault and let me know that, contrary to school policy, she was not notified when the incident happened but the next day, I believe after we met with the two principals. She said that she would be talking to the parents of the students involved and would let me know how that went. She also re-confirmed that we could press charges and that we have a year in which to decide to do so.
• I was given the name of a lady at the County Schools Central Office who is the contact if you feel that the school did not handle a situation like this correctly. Well, we certainly don't feel it was handled correctly! I spoke with her this morning and am waiting to hear back from her after she contacts the school and speaks with the principals. I get the feeling that she has never had to deal with something like this and doesn't know how to proceed.

Our school district has a supposed "Anti-Bullying Policy" that no one in the school system seems to know what it is. When you ask them what it is they direct you to the County's Schools website. Then you can't find it there. We had to call and speak to the receptionist only to be told she needed to find it herself and then call us back and direct us how to find it. So much for their strict stance against bullying, when we did find it we learned that it basically leaves the decision on how to handle things up to the individual schools. That is not a strict bullying policy, that is a cop-out, and kids are the ones who are suffering because of the school systems inability to take a stand. Not just the kids who are being bullied but the ones who are doing the bullying. I do believe "kids will be kids", but I also STRONGLY believe that it's our job as the adults in their lives to teach them what actions are wrong. I believe that some wrong actions have been committed and no one is stepping up to teach these kids the lesson they need to learn.

Especially in light of recent news stories about kids who were bullied, I can not "just let this go". I have other children who will be going through this school in years to come, one who is already there and one with special needs who will attend there in a few years. I hate to imagine what things may be like if something isn't done NOW. What might it be like for Liza if things at that school only get worse? This is a fight I refuse to give up on.

If you are just as incensed over this as I am please share this post with everyone you know. There has been a miscarriage of justice and I intend to see it made right if I have to make more noise than I have ever made in my life. 1/2 day of ISS or OSS is NOT enough for an assault on another student. A serious message needs to be sent to the entire student body to ensure that something like this (or worse) does not happen again! No, I have not shared the name of the school but if you know how to use Google you can probably figure it out. I want my entire county to know about this and if needed the rest of the USA.

Where's the sense in that?

Did everyone hear about the little girl in Florida who was removed from school by police for bringing a knife to school in her lunchbox? Read the News article if you haven't.

I understand in this day and age that seeing a knife in the school can cause concern but I still can't help but think that there was serious lack of good judgement shown here. Every article I found specifically stated that she did not threaten anyone or brandish the knife. I noticed the police said that it was school policy that they be called because the knife was considered a weapon. What makes a steak knife a weapon? Wouldn't it be at the moment that it was used in a threatening way? Which it was not. All she wanted to do with it was cut the steak that she had brought for her lunch. Why couldn't the knife have just been taken from her, her parents called and she talked to about why you don't bring steak knives to school?

I don't see any common sense reason this child should have been transported from school in the back of a police car and now have the threat of felony weapons charges hanging over her head. Were the teachers hands tied by rules or did they just see what they perceived to be a weapon and go overboard? I'm not sure I'd be happy with either answer if I was that child's mother.