Music and Life: There Were Clouds in My Coffee

Way back before TSwift was even thought of Carly Simon wrote a song dedicated to some guy who is really vain and must have really ticked her off. When I was a kid I remember every time this song would come on the radio I would say to my mom, "This song makes no sense! Of course it's about him. And who is 'he' anyway? " and she would just say something like, "That's the point" and "No one knows who it's really about." I just couldn't get it. It seemed silly to write a song about someone being so vain they thought the song was about them when it was obviously about them.

Now that I'm grown, I get it. The point is that if he really is that vain he's probably been driving himself crazy all these years wondering if it's REALLY about HIM, right? And, on top of that, she could be driving more than one dude crazy at the same time. I now think Carly Simon is a freaking genius! Oh, and TayTay ain't got nothing on her when it comes to using a song to exact revenge on an ex.

I heard the song in my car the other day and the first thing I thought of was the conversations I had with my mom about it as a kid. I love how music can bring back memories - sometimes good, sometimes not. Then I realized that I really like the song now and I listened to the lyrics. For the next couple days the line, "I had some dreams - there were clouds in my coffee, clouds in my coffee" kept running thru my head. I finally had to look up what she meant and this is what Carly herself had to say:  

"Clouds in my coffee" are the confusing aspects of life and love. That which you can't see 

through, and yet seems alluring...until. Like a mirage that turns into a dry patch. 

Perhaps there is something in the bottom of the coffee cup that you could read if you could 

(like tea leaves or coffee grinds). Carly Simon 5/17/01 

Huh?  Okay, I can go with that.

So, are there any songs that have "grown on you" as you've grown up? Any memories of your own that this song brings to mind for you? Or maybe you have a "vain" ex you secretly dedicate this song to every time you hear it?

Music and Life: Fighting Dragons

We are big fans of Taylor Swift here in our house. I think she seems like the sweetest person and so far she doesn't seem to have let her fame go to her head. On top of that, she's a very gifted singer/songwriter and there aren't a whole lot of her songs that we don't love.

This one is mine and Noah's favorite song by her right now. I had listened to it a few times and just knew I liked it but had never paid attention to the lyrics. Then one day Noah asked me to play the "dragon song" while we were on a long car trip and after the second time hearing it I really paid attention and realized that not only was the music good but the words really had a great message.

Some of my favorite lyrics are:
"And the cynics were outraged
Screaming, "this is absurd"
'Cause for a moment a band of thieves in ripped up jeans got to rule the world"
and
"long live all the mountains we moved
I had the time of my life
Fighting dragons with you"


Don't we all wish for just one day where this is our song? I know I've felt like a member of that "band of thieves" waiting for my moment to rule the World. 


I'm dedicating this song to my kids. I hope that someday they all have moments like this in their lives. That they celebrate the walls they crash through. That they have friends they can trust to fight the dragons alongside of. That someday the Kingdom lights will shine just for them and that they prove all the cynics wrong. 

Music and Life: This Christmas

I love this song. It has been one of my favorite Christmas songs by a Christian artist since it was first released. the story of the little boy touches you and draws you in. It just makes you remember what Christmas is really supposed to be about.

But THIS Christmas it hits me so much harder. This Christmas everytime I hear this song I can't help but look at my daughter and ache for the Christmases that she was alone, but in the same moment rejoice that she is now no longer an orphan. That This Christmas she will celebrate with a family. She will belong.

But, still the tears come. My throat clogs up and I can't talk. Because This Christmas I remember the faces of the children who are still there. The ones who will be all alone This Christmas. I can't stand the thought. I'm crying as I type this. "My" sweet hearts - the ones I held and loved on. The ones I saw from across the room because I wasn't allowed to go in to them and they were never allowed to come out because they can't walk, or they can't see. These faces are haunting me This Christmas. I can't stand the thought that there are children who will pass Christmas day as if it were just another day. Now that I have seen them and held them it is so much more real to me. My heart is breaking.

This Christmas my prayer, my wish, the only thing I really want is for them to have families who want them. Who will move Heaven and Earth to bring them home. That truly is my hearts cry.

Please visit Reece's Rainbow. I beg you to especially take a look at Maxim or Evan or Kate or just any of the hundreds of kids listed who need families so desperately.

Music and Life: Can't Forget What I Saw

I've shared this song before but the video was slightly different. I have loved the song ever since the first time I heard it, I felt like she was singing my heart's cry. But, since I have been here and so many of those faces have become real, and not just pictures on my computer screen, this song has even more meaning.

I saw what I saw and I really can't forget it. People talk about how there is a hunger in the children's eyes and it makes you tear up, but it's not real until you've seen it yourself. Until you've held them in your arms and you know that when you leave you can't take them all with you. I laughed when they chased after us for snacks and attention, but I cried my last day there knowing I was leaving them behind.

Come on just imagine for a minute. Can you see what I've seen? The need is so great, but we have been called to meet it. All it takes is one step of faith. I promise He will meet you there. He is FAITHFUL and He has called.

Religion that God our Father accepts as

pure and faultless is this: to look after

orphans and widows

in their distress and to keep oneself

from being polluted by the world. James 1:27

Please consider giving a donation to Reece's Rainbow today to give these children a home, a hope, and a future. You could donate to Evan, my Christmas Angel, or any of the other kids listed on Reece's Rainbow. The only thing that stands in the way of all of these kids having families is money. It's the honest truth, in the last few months I have seen at least 3 kids have families commit to them the MOMENT there grants were fully funded. Please give or go. Allow yourself to see what I, and so many others, have seen. It is SO worth how your heart may break!

Music and Life: Just A Swingin'....

And NO, not like LeAnn does it! The way she sings it in the two videos I've seen make me think she took the term "Swingin'"the way that some couples who are a little too frisky (and weird) do. Know what I mean.....?

Gotta be John Anderson singin' this song, baby! No one else. I have loved him and his voice since I was about 4 or 5 years old and since that was about 30 years ago, well, that's a long time to love somebody. Plus, I was born in Florida, he's from Florida, it just always seemed that he was meant to be one of my very favoritest singers. He definitely has a unique voice, and I think that's what I really love. No one else sounds quite like Mr. John Anderson. And NO ONE (Not even LR) can sing this song quite like he can :)



I tried to get my boys to come listen to it with me. Here's how that conversation went:

Me to Austin: "This was my favorite song when I was about 5 years old!"

Austin: (as he walks by) "Hmm, that's nice."

Me: "Humph"

ME to Noah: " Noah, wanna come hear my favorite song from when I was 5?!"

Noah: (playing his video game) "Nah, I'm good."

Me: (See my facial expression)

Music and Life: Zephaniah 3:17

Did you know that Zephaniah 3:17 says that the God of the Universe rejoices over us with singing? I have been going through a tough time the past few months and this verse was spoken over me so many times by different people. It was as if the Lord was saying, "Hey, I DO love you and I'm here - even if you don't feel like I am." Every time I would hear this verse it was like I was getting a reassuring hug from my Dad.

I learned that whenever a song would stick around in my head or I would find myself singing something constantly, especially if it's a song that is not a favorite, to begin to listen to what God might be trying to say to me.



This one, by Jimmy Needham, has been running through my head since yesterday and this morning I finally realized that the words are speaking to how I've been feeling the past week. I have been struggling with feeling like I just don't care sometimes, like my joy is fading away. I know that I love God and believe that Jesus is my Savior, but sometimes it feels like I have to work at keeping myself in a right place. And, of course then I can fall into feeling guilty.

But, then I started really paying attention to the song that had been running through my head for the past day and a half. I realized that this is the song that He is singing over me right now and he wants me to know that I'm forgiven, loved, and free. Even when it feels like "my joy has been on holiday and my peace has almost passed away", He is still here and He still loves me. I am so glad!

Music and Life: Morgan County Georgia

Isn't it funny how you never realize you actually like your hometown until you leave it?

At least, that's the way it was for me. I grew up in the small town of Madison, Georgia and went to Morgan County Public schools from K-10. We moved the summer before I entered 11th grade. I hated leaving because I had finally felt like I found where I belonged. I wasn't one of the popular kids but I think I can say that most people liked me ok, and I liked most people. I'm still that way, I get along with pretty much everyone and I've finally realized that if people don't like me, well, that's most likely their problem.

These songs always make me think of growing up in Morgan County. Every time I hear "International Harvester" I see myself in the backseat with my Mom or Dad driving while we waited for the farmer, usually a friend of mine's cousin or uncle, to get from one field to the next so we could have the road back. I always seem to remember my Dad never minded so much. Probably because he worked on a few of the farms around us through the years and he knew what it was like to get honked at and glared at by impatient drivers while he was trying to do his job. To this day, if I get behind a tractor I'm usually pretty content to just wait til they get to where they need to be or pull to the side to let me pass.




This one, "Good Directions", well, to me it's just got Morgan County written all over it! Maybe I'm just sentimental because I'm getting older, but every time I hear this song I think about roadside fruit and vegetable stands, country stores where you could get Brunswick stew and REAL sweet tea (that's rare here in Virginia), and I knew quite a few Bell's (In the version I chose he says Ms. Beth, but in the one you hear on the radio he says Ms Bell). I chose this one cause Luke Bryan is the one who wrote the song, he's from South Georgia, and someone I go to church with says he's her cousin :)



I might be biased, but I think I grew up in a place that's maybe not perfect but, really isn't such a bad place to say you come from. A lot of times I wish my kids were growing up there too. Going to school in the same buildings that I went to school in and being taught by some of the same teachers. Or teachers that were students there when I was. I'm just a small town country girl who dreams of the simple life, I guess. Ah well, bloom where you're planted is what "They" say, right? I'll just do that...

...and maybe make some turnip greens tonight ;o)

Music and Life: The Drunk Version

We were in the local Irish store yesterday and I heard this song and now I can't get it out of my head. At first I just laughed at it cause the dude calls the whiskey the devil and then turns around and says "...you're me darlin' drunk or sober!" I found that funny for some reason...

Then when it was running around in my head most of the day and I caught myself singing it I thought I'd look it up and found that one of the verses they say, "o'er hills and mountains into Americay". So, the whiskey landed him in America? Hmmm, that could explain what's up with one of the nearer towns to me. Oh, wait, are ya'll reading this over there? Love you guys....

Enjoy me new favorite song! Rick just told me (jokingly) I shouldn't listen to stuff like this, "it'll warp your mind." He must not know me very well. Pahahaha!

WHISKEY YOU'RE THE DEVIL

Chorus:
Whiskey you're the devil you're leading me astray
Over hills and mountains into Americay
You're sweeter, stronger, decenter
You're spunkier than tea
Oh whiskey you're me darlin' drunk or sober!

Oh, now brave boys we're on for marching
Up to Portugal and Spain drums are beating, banners flying
The devil all home will come tonight
Love, fare thee well

With me tiddle-ee-iddle-doodle-a-ma-da me tiddle-ee-iddle-doodle-a-ma-da
Me rightful too-ra-laddie-oh
There's whiskey in the jar

Said the mother do not wrong me do not take me daughter from me
For if you do I will torment you
And after death me ghost will haunt you
Love fare thee well

Oh the French are fighting boldly
Men are dying hot and coldly
Give every man his flask of powder
His firelock upon his shoulder
Love fare thee well

Music and Life: Worth it All

This song was brought back to my mind yesterday, thanks to Tracie. I had written typed a post back in May using this song and was glad to be reminded of it again. Especially in light of everything we've gone through since May. Hmm, maybe let's take a little stroll down memory lane:

• First it was finding out the HS agency wasn't gonna be so easy to work with. (See post linked above)
• Then some not true things were said by our former foster child or someone close to her. Still never got the full story on that. All I know is that we were maybe the "bad guys" for a bit. Minor bad guys, but it still hurt to have our name dragged down like that.
• Car trouble - as in, having to buy a new one kind of trouble. Which took a little bite out of the 401K money that we had borrowed to pay adoption expenses.
• Commissioner of Revenue trouble.
• Then came the Psychologist Saga 
• After we finally found Dr. Psychologist and met with him he went AWOL on us. Yep, he thought the reports were faxed by his assistant, disappeared for a while, only to come back to frantic messages from me. Poor guy probably hopes he never has to see me again :) Honestly, I hope the same. No offense Dr. Psychologist.
• Now, I find myself feeling lonely and depressed at times. We are almost at the end of this and everything has finally smoothed out with the actual process and my emotions go hay-wire. Maybe it's a spiritual attack? Maybe it's hormones and stress? I tend to think it's a little bit of both, but I'm hanging in there.
  

So, I list all the hurdles we've had to jump and all the stresses and people probably wonder, "Why?! Why put yourself through this?" All I can answer to that is this:

I look at this sweet little face and I know that it's all gonna be worth it. One day I am gonna hold her in my arms and hear her sweet laugh or feel her arms hug my neck and I will know all of this was worth it.

Music and Life-I Hate Everything

First time I heard this song I thought, "What a pitiful country song. You can't really hate EVERYTHING." But, today I know how he feels.



No, we haven't really had bad news or anything. I am just sick of chasing down Dr. Psychologist trying to find out if the reports ever got done. I'm sick of not having a Homestudy done that should have been done a long time ago. I'm sick of trying to get "people" (I really wanted to say something else but will restrain myself)to just sign a piece of paper that we need for our dossier. I'm sick of having to fight the enemy and his minions at every turn in this adoption. Mostly, I am just sick to death of being thousands of miles from my daughter.

So, now I feel a little better and plan to drink a little wine, eat a cupcake, and dig the rest of the chocolate frosting out of the tub until I'm sick of it too.

Any body got a problem with that?!................


I didn't think so...... ;o)

Music and Life: Tearing Up

Ok, so I am NOT "gonna keep drinking till I'm petrified" or "lost my mind", and half the time I "can't even think" sober. After last night's post I had to cheer myself up and for some reason the title made me think of this song. I thought it was appropriate cause Liza is constantly on my mind and the constant tearing up is because I am lonely for her, right? So, if I had a beer right about now it would most likely have a tear in it!

Well, anyway. I thought it was funny! Going to check the fridge....... ;o)

Music and Life: Austin, Noah, Johnny Cash and CDB

In our house we love to laugh at the dinner table. I've mentioned it before. Too bad Ricky was sleeping tonight cause this one caused some of us to bust a gut. He wasn't amused...again.

Recently in Music Appreciation class Austin was introduced to the song,"Devil Went Down to Georgia". As a good Southern girl, and fan of CDB, I am a little ashamed to admit that he doesn't remember ever hearing this song before. I'm blaming it on the idea I once had that it was wrong to like a song that talked about a boy making a deal with the devil. I have since come to the conclusion that "the d" gets his butt whooped so it's ok. I'm sticking with that. But, I digress.

So, back to the point. Austin was introduced to the song recently and tonight during dinner preparation and at the table we were discussing the song and who's heard it and who might sing it. Someone mentioned that Johnny Cash sang it ( we corrected that later) and that sent my boys off on a small foray into song writing. It was quite hilarious and I HAD to share.

Here's how it went down:

Austin: "Ew Ew! Noah and I made up a remix about this song!"

This is when they both started thumping their chests in rhythm.

Boys: "The Devil went down to Georgia. He was looking for a soul to steal. When he saw Johnny Cash playing a piccolo, and he said "let's make a deal". And as he rosined up his bow he said, "Play that funky music white boy!""

Maybe it was only funny to us or you had to be there. We thought it was hilarious. Skippy and I cracked up so hard I'm surprised we didn't both choke on our soup.

Music and Life-Noah 1-4-09

What kind of bad motherblogger am I? Yes, that was my sad attempt at humor. Feel free to ignore it. Here's the deal. One of my kids had a birthday on January 4th and I am just now getting around to his birthday post. Horrid, right?

Noah, my "baby", is ten years old now. I am totally flabbergasted at how he could possibly be that old, but he is. He reminded me the other day when I said he was nine. This is the child that proved to me that I truly could love another child just as much as I loved Austin. The one who makes the craziest facial expressions you've probably ever seen without even trying. The kid who says the most random things at random times to crack everyone up.

One of the funniest things that I love about Noah is his issue with kissing. He decided at around 2 1/2 that he was done with kissing people and stopped giving kisses. If you wanted a kiss he offered you his cheek so you could kiss him. This was kind of hard for me, until I discovered that I was the ONLY person he would randomly go to and offer a kiss to. Those kisses were so much more special for me because I knew that kissing was not really his thing. I'm happy to say it's still not and let's keep it that way!

Noah is funny, sweet, and friendly but shy. Oh, and tremendously cute too! He's a huge Bakugan and Harry Potter fan. He loves his big brother, and is in that stage where he wants his own identity yet still wants to know Austin will be willing to play Nerf gun wars with him.


This is Noah's favorite song right now. "99 Red Balloons" by Goldfinger. He knows that this is a remake of an old song but I don't think he's ever heard the original. He'd probably prefer this one anyway.


Happy Birthday Noah! I love you!

Music and Life-My Fave Christmas song?

I am not a huge fan of Christmas music. There are some songs that I really like and some I just can't stand. I think some are too overdone. Every artist who wants to make some money off a Christmas album has to try their hand at this one or that one. Maybe I'm just a scrooge, but I just don't want to listen to the same song 20 times a day by 20different artists.

Tonight however, I had the opportunity to hear one of my favorite Christmas songs. It never fails to bring a smile to my face and I don't believe any other artist has attempted to cover it.



Ok, yes, it's Jeff Foxworthy and not a "real" Christmas song. But, it makes me laugh and it's one I don't mind hearing every year. I'll try to post some of my real favorites later on. Hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did!

Music and Life-Austin

Today is my oldest son's birthday, That baby boy that taught me how strong a mother's love really is. The one who helped show me just what a miracle life is and how strong the Father's love for us is; after all, doesn't He love us more than I love my son? Wow!

I remember taking Austin to church for the first time after he was born. A beautiful Jamaican lady, who attended there as long as I can remember and had known me since I was small, was one of the first to sidle over to take a look at my beautiful baby. She asked what his name was, but when I told her she misunderstood and thought I said Awesome. So, she proceeded to tell lots of folks that his name was Awesome :) hehe

Maybe she spoke that into his life that Sunday morning, because he is awesome. He's loving, protective of his Mama, helpful, looks out for his little brother, and he has a way with younger kids that just amazes me. He's a super funny kid who says the craziest things that you don't expect and he's super smart, I have to get him to help me with math when I'm cooking. How sad is that? lol


Austin loves Johnny Cash, especially his song "A Boy Named Sue".


Happy Birthday Austin! Love you!

Music and Life: 9-11-01

I was at work, about 45 miles from the Pentagon. My office manager got a call from her daughter and we turned on the television and watched the footage of the most unbelievable events I've witnessed in my life. After we heard that the Pentagon had also been hit we walked outside and I swear we saw small bits of ash falling from the sky. I never in all my life thought something like this would happen in America, I guess I just took for granted that we were safe. It brought home to me how things can change in a moment and how life has to be lived right now while we have the chance.

I don't like watching clips of footage like what is seen in this video but I know I need to be visually reminded sometimes. We should not allow ourselves to forget what happened to us. Our entire NATION was violated that day. Can you imagine the horror that those who knew they would not escape the Towers faced in those last few moments? I don't think our President is perfect and I am not sure where I stand on how the war has gone, but I do think that he took us into this with every intention of making sure that something like what happened seven years ago yesterday morning is not allowed to happen again.

Wher we were you? Do you remember?

Music and Life-"I Wonder"

DISCLAIMER: I cried writing this post, but still felt it needed to come out and be shared. We all have experienced something that can help others who are hurting. I hope ya'll don't mind me being real :)


This song made me cry today. It chokes me up every time I hear it, but today it was a little closer to home. See, my ex, and my boys' bio dad, has been released from prison and has been trying to contact me. I heard through the grapevine that what he wants is to give up his rights to the boys so that he's not obligated to pay child support. Can't say I didn't see that one coming, as sad as it is.

I wonder a lot of times how my boys will feel about their bio dad as they get older. Will they forgive him for not choosing to be a part of their lives? For choosing drugs, alcohol, and partying over them? And I try to reconcile that with how I feel about my own bio dad, who has been an alcoholic all my life and most of his own. I do know that even after all these years, and especially now that I am a parent myself, it's so hard to understand how a mother or father cannot summon the courage and will to change in order not to lose their child/children. Wouldn't I do anything I needed in order to keep my children with me or at least have the privilege to have them in my life? That's the type of question I avoided as a kid because the answers were too painful for me then. Now, I know that it's not about what I was or wasn't but about what my dad was incapable of doing and the blame falls squarely on his shoulders.

It also makes me think of any children who will come into our home through foster care. Separated from their parents by choices that those parents have made. Especially if the choices the parents made lead to the kids not being able to return home. How is that going to leave those children feeling? How will that effect the relationships that we will hope to build with them?

Honestly, I'm thankful that I have my own experiences to fall back on now. I know what it's like to wonder why my parent couldn't change for me. To wish that things could be different. I hope to be able to share that with my own boys and our foster/adoptive children as needed. I'm thankful for a Father God who showed me many years ago that He was always there, always the Father that I thought I was missing out on. I'm also thankful for a stepfather who was there and loved me in his quiet way, even when I didn't want to accept that love. I hope that I'll be able to do the same for all the hurting ones that God sees fit to send my way.

Music and Life-When I Wasn't Cool

Okay, so by posting this everyone knows I am officially uncool :)

I remember being in about 5th grade and everyone's talking about what music they listen to. They all insisted they listened to whatever was popular then, I can't remember what. What I do remember is that they emphatically denied listening to country, whatever this horrid country was they hated it and if you listened to it you were NOT cool. So, I said, "I don't listen to country (I knew the stuff I loved was awesome so it couldn't be this country they were talking about) Then, my friend says, "What station do you listen to?" My reply, "Y106" Her reply, "Melissa, that is country"

That's the day I found out country wasn't cool. Oh Well!

Music and Life-Albertine

This is one of my new favorite songs. I am so impressed with this young lady for so many reasons. Her voice is amazing and she is using it to spread a message that she is passionate about. It's obvious that this is not all about her but all about getting the Word out. Not just the word of those who she has seen that are suffering, but the Word of God.




I first heard of Brooke at church one Sunday morning when the Worship team played a new song,"Lead Me to the Cross". When I got home I searched MYSpace for it and that's how I found "Albertine". She's doing some touring here in the States starting June, 2 and I'd like to go see her not just to listen to her beautiful voice but to hear her message.

Music and Life-Josh Turner

I have loved Josh Turner's music since I first heard "Long Black Train". I love his voice and just how his music seems sincere. It reminds me of country that I loved growing up, not "Today's Hot New Country", which I can't stand a whole lot of. I had never heard this one before, I guess it doesn't get played on most radio stations. I love how Josh obviously has a strong faith and doesn't try to hide it. But, I also love that he doesn't feel he has to make only christian music. I went through a phase where I thought the only way for me to be a good christian girl was to only listen to christian music. That was hard, because I love country music, it's like it's in my genetic makeup. I can't explain how a fiddle, banjo, or Randy Travis can stir me. I've grown and I know now that I can love Jesus even if I listen to country sometimes. I love praise and worship music, don't get me wrong, but sometimes I still need to hear Reba or Randy or Keith Whitley or......the list goes on and on....